Clarity is greater than resolution
a greater goal for couples is deepening understanding of each others reality without attempting to agree on reality. When each member of the couple can accept the others experience, and in that way actually want to know what their experience is, rather than focusing on having the other share their own reality, the relationship and intimacy ironically can deepen. Focusing on what the other's experience is, what they actually hear, feel, see, and experience, makes the space for both parties to be more fully aware of reality. and reality always wins!